CONFESSION

DISCIPLINE

Screen Shot 2015-10-22 at 4.14.34 PM…FATHER, lead me to the correct understanding of discipline so I may not only appreciate it but joy in it. My first thought when You present me with a painful, difficult, situation is that You are punishing me because You think I should know better.

I am quite aware that I commit many and varied sins, but I don’t need discipline because I’m a sinner, I need to be disciplined because I’m human (ref#5, p40). It is my prideful humanity You are attempting to root out of me; You are not attempting to discourage me from a particular sin.

Keep reminding me Your reproof is an indication that You care enough to teach me (Job 5:17). Certainly at the moment all discipline is painful rather than pleasant but it yields the fruit of righteousness (Heb 12:11).

FATHER, I will praise You because You discipline me in just measure (Jer 30:11). You promise I can always endure whatever circumstances You put me in (1 Cor 10:13). You are with me to save me (Jer 30:11). You give me power to keep myself calm in the days of adversity (Ps 94:13). Enduring the disciplinary trial proves my faith and produces perseverance and steadfastness and patience (James 1:3).

FATHER, commit to my understanding the fact that You issue discipline because You love me (Heb 12:6). When I go astray You call me back to You with discipline. Your steadfast love will not depart from me (2 Sam 7:14-15). You will not be false to Your faithfulness, nor violate Your covenant or alter the word that goes forth from Your lips (Ps 89:33-34). You chasten and scourge me because You cherish me (Heb 12:6).

“Divine love chastens because it sees the necessity for the correction. The Lord’s love is not blind affection….It is our mercy to know that love marks our iniquity, and that love and not justice, grace and not vengeance, holds the rod and administers the correction….those stripes of His rod are as much…the expression of His love as are the ‘kisses of His mouth’…” (ref#61, Jan 16th).

Submitting to Your discipline is good for me so I may share in Your holiness (Heb 12:10). I desire to be trained by it because it yields peaceful righteousness for me (Heb 12:11). Thank You for Your discipline.

CONFESSION

 

PARDON IS NOT TO MAKE ME MORE ACCEPTABLE TO GOD

Screen Shot 2015-10-12 at 12.29.54 PMLORD, as I approach Your throne, my natural reaction is to cry out like Isaiah, “I have unclean lips” (Isa 6:5), and so desire to spill out my confessions of sin before I come close to You.

In the prayer JESUS taught His disciples, the first half of it is words of worship and honor to You. Confession of sin is toward the end of the prayer and then takes up only ½ a sentence.

Remind me FATHER, You do not throw the robe of CHRIST upon me so You can tolerate looking at me. You do not demand I confess my sin before You let me approach You. You know my frame (Ps 103:14) and my sinfulness does not give You pause.

A woman may forget she is nursing a child, but You will never forget me. You engraved me on the palm of Your hands (Isa 49:15,16) before I did anything right or wrong (Rom 9:11).

You seek and solicit my love constantly. You love me at the expense of Your Son’s blood—at the expense of condescending to beseech me (ref#18, [1 John 4:18]). Have You not rend the heavens and come down to be constantly beside me (Isa 64:1)? You are willing to call me Your bride even when I am unfaithful to You (Hosea 3:1).

I have mistaken thoughts about confession! My natural thought is to dwell on Your assurance of pardon to convince myself that I am now good enough to come into Your presence. FATHER, remind me once again that I am good only because CHRIST has made me His own, not because I have confessed my sins and received Your pardon.

Isn’t this what Job was so upset about—justifying himself before You? Job wanted You to speak to him about his sin—or lack thereof. Did You do that? No, You instead overwhelmed Job with Your majesty (Job 38:1-41:34).

Astonish me like You did Job. I want to spend the majority of my time with You losing myself in Your love.

“…if the heart be…much taken up with…the eminency of the Father’s love, it cannot choose but be overpowered, conquered, and endeared unto him” John Owen (ref#35, p128).

CONFESSION

STORMING HEAVEN

Screen Shot 2015-10-12 at 6.28.52 AM“Convince me that I can have no peace at death, nor hope that I should go to Christ, unless I intend to do his will and have his fullness while I live” The Valley of Vision (ref#76, p167).

FATHER, heaven is not obtained except I violently take it by force (Matt 11:12). Since getting into CHRIST’s presence is never my natural desire, in the mundane or easy days I must power myself into CHRIST’s kingdom.

I default to the control of myself in a thousand different ways as I look for contentment. But, Oswald Chambers makes a statement that I must consider: “…we do not want to realize Jesus Christ, but only our enjoyment of Him” (ref#7, July 10th).

I can use prayer and Bible reading for the purpose of my enjoyment. I can serve the church for my own well-feelings. In honesty, I must ask myself, “Am I a Christian because it is pleasurable?”

FATHER, always clue me I am on the broad path that leads to destruction (Matt 7:13) if I avoid being stirred up or am not willing to face “injustice and meanness and ingratitude and turmoil” (ref#7, July 10th). I have to believe storming heaven will mean physical stress, but because of my willful resolve and determination I will reap a joy superior to all joy—a joy that cannot be found anywhere else but in fellowship with You (ref#16, [1 Cor 2:9]).

“Faith makes things possible, but not easy” (a church marquee).

CONFESSION

I SIN KNOWINGLY BUT NOT WILLFULLY

Screen Shot 2015-09-26 at 10.25.35 AMFATHER, I grieve especially over the sins I commit knowing full well I’m disobeying You. Can You forgive me for such in-Your-face, blatant, rebellion?

 The book of Leviticus describes sacrifices for sins. But the sacrifices are only for unintentional sins (Lev 4:2). The writer of Hebrews says:

“…if we sin willfully after we have received the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins,” (Heb 10:26 NKJV).

Yet, I, as well as other Christians, knowingly sin—even King David prayed that You keep him back from “…presumptuous sins…(Ps 19:13 NASB). FATHER, help me understand that I may sin knowingly, as King David did but that does not mean I sin willfully. Sinning willfully means sinning willingly. Sinning willingly means I sin out of my own glad choice with no intention of repenting. Adam Clarke’s Commentary brings meaning to Hebrews 10:26:

“A man may be overtaken in a fault, or he may deliberately go into sin, and yet neither renounce the Gospel, nor deny the Lord that bought him.” Adam Clarke (ref#15, [Heb 10:26]).

But, “if we sin willfully] If we deliberately…renounce the profession of the Gospel and the Author of that Gospel,…the…case must be utterly without remedy.” (ref#15, [Heb 10:26]).

When I do sin deliberately, my “case is dreary and dangerous but it is not hopeless; no case is hopeless but that of the deliberate apostate who rejects the whole Gospel system,…” (ref#15, [Heb 10:26]). And, all thanks to You, FATHER, that You have cemented in my heart never to reject the Gospel.

How I thank You, FATHER, that You give me the grace of confession. Yes, You have put in my heart the desire to repent. You have closed the gate behind me. Because You have made me Yours, I will never again sin willfully.

Though FATHER, drive me to fear sinning against You deliberately. Such actions remove me from Your presence. My iniquities always make a separation between You and me. My sins hide Your face so that You do not hear me (Isa 59:2).

LORD, I take hold of Your grace of repentance and use it to bring myself back into Your presence. And, FATHER, during this activity of repentance, sober me into remembering that even though I will never sin willfully, sinning knowingly is dreary and dangerous.

CONFESSION

…REFORMING MY FLESH OR KEEPING IT DEAD

Screen Shot 2015-09-24 at 1.13.23 PM…FATHER, I know that my natural disposition must be crucified with CHRIST (that is, my flesh must die). The word, “flesh” means my human nature which is “under the control of animal appetites” and is sensuous (ref#150, NT:4559). “Flesh” is defined as my earthly nature apart from divine influence (ref#150, NT:4561).

Flesh is the part of me I must inactivate—kill by neglect. But I am anchored so in it I naturally choose to reform it instead of kill it.

It is intuitive to me to want flesh tamed. Therefore I strive to educate my flesh—teach it to be righteous. I happily give myself over to rules and methods (ref#33, p92). Intensive church activity is a way of attempting to reform flesh. It is frightening to realize that my own flesh can produce acts that appear Christian (Matt 7:22-23) yet they are without the help or consent of You, FATHER (ref#63, p706).

While teaching my flesh to be righteous I concentrate on one sin or a file-folder of sins. I fall into using my flawed self to try to become more like CHRIST. By doing this, I am in the business of trying to conquer and refine my old-nature flesh. I try to get flesh and SPIRIT to cooperate!

But, I cannot, and You, FATHER, will not reform my flesh—even the priceless blood of JESUS can’t cleanse the flesh. The HOLY SPIRIT does nothing to improve flesh; in fact, He will not even dwell in the midst of sinful flesh. The SPIRIT will abide in me for only one reason and that is for warring against my flesh (ref#33, p94).

O LORD, continually bring me to understand the difference between operating by my flesh and working with the SPIRIT—the difference between reforming my flesh and killing it by neglect. It is only by faith and dependence on the SPIRIT that I can put to death the deeds of my flesh (Rom 8:13).

CONFESSION

CONVICTING SPIRIT

Screen Shot 2015-09-23 at 8.40.19 PM…FATHER, the discovery of my sin is a part of the wisdom that is hid in CHRIST and made known to me through the SPIRIT (Col 2:2,3). If I am not attentive to the SPIRIT I only have a sense and knowledge of sin that is revealed by my conscience; it is the general knowledge of good and evil. But, it’s obscure so I notice my own faults only if they are very obvious or I sin in such a way that they are particularly embarrassing to me (ref#35, p200).

Familiarizing myself with the laws set down in the Old Testament helps me recognize more of my corruptions. But even laws do nothing to make me see my deep personal sin (ref#35, p202).

The work of conviction, from Your SPIRIT, gives me the best knowledge of sin. This knowledge is so useful that it reveals sins that I, on my own, do not have the ability to detect; these sins must be made real to me by Your SPIRIT—a source not connected with my native nature (ref#35, p202).

I thank You FATHER, for Your SPIRIT’s conviction. I am not offended when I recognize His voice, instead, I’m humbled. He has the ability to convince me of sin in such a way that I’m unable to deny His words and am ready to repent. I thank You, FATHER, that Your SPIRIT not only is able to point out my sins but has the ability to accomplish in me the sorrow for sin which leads me to the obedience You require. So, search me, O GOD, and see if there is any grievous way in me and then lead me in the right way (Ps 139:23-24).

CONFESSION

DISCIPLESHIP

Screen Shot 2015-09-23 at 12.23.55 PMALL-WISE FATHER, I do not need to know how to disciple others. I only need to know how to be a disciple myself. My life lived out teaches others of what it is to be a disciple.

“Our Lord makes a disciple His own possession, He becomes responsible for him….The spirit that comes in is not that of doing anything for Jesus, but of being a perfect delight to Him” Oswald Chambers (ref#7, Sept 4th).

“…the only men and women He will use…are those who love Him personally, passionately and devotedly beyond any of the closest ties on earth” Oswald Chambers (ref#7, May 7th).

FATHER, forgive me for not taking seriously enough Your constraint on me as CHRIST’s disciple. Let me put my energies toward exclusively becoming personally, passionately and devotedly yielded to CHRIST. May I desire not to rejoice in successful service, but rejoice that I’m rightly related to CHRIST (ref#7, Oct 27th).

JESUS said, “…’All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go…and make disciples…” (Matt 28:18-19 ESV). Do I believe that when I “go” JESUS does the work of making disciples? This is my challenge. If I believe “that people are difficult to get saved, that backsliders are difficult to reclaim,…” Oswald Chambers (ref#7, Oct 27th) it is because I have commissioned myself with my natural talents to make disciples.

Making a relationship with You, LORD, is my work. And, relationship-making is difficult work. Because I desire such a relationship, satan may no longer tempt me to simply do wrong things.

Instead, his temptations will be along the same line that he tempted JESUS. His temptations will be crafted toward separating You from me. He hopes to discourage me so I give up on all the grace You have put into me (ref#7, Sept 18th). Satan attempts to keep me from being obedient to You. He wants me to cease being Your disciple (ref#7, Sept 18th). Therefore, FATHER, enlarge my desire to muse on CHRIST and enjoy His presence above all.

CONFESSION

MISDIRECTED ZEAL

Screen Shot 2015-09-17 at 1.09.15 PM…FATHER, R.A. Torrey gives me reason to check myself to see if my good works come from my relationship with JESUS or my depraved nature. He says:

“The doctrine that man is totally depraved does not mean that he is totally corrupt….while seeking to please himself, a man may do things that are morally attractive and beautiful….He is as truly depraved as the man who chooses the immoral things, but his tastes are not as corrupt…” (ref#30, p62,63).

John Owen further identifies depravity:

“…persons who know not Christ…would spin a holiness out of their own bowels; they would work it out in their own strength. They begin by trying endeavors; and follow it with vows, duties, resolutions, engagements, sweating at it all the day long….” (ref#35, p333).

The Apostle Paul laments over his sisters and brothers of Israel who spin their own holiness. He says:

 “I know what enthusiasm they have for God, but it is misdirected zeal. For they don’t understand God’s way of making people right with himself. Refusing to accept God’s way, they cling to their own way of getting right with God by trying to keep the law” (Rom 10:2-3 NLT).

It can be easy to find pride in being moral—self-ordering activities toward righteousness. Take my eyes off CHRIST and I’ll fall into striving to be good. I know my righteousness is only through the SPIRIT by faith (Gal 5:5). FATHER, I want to stay with the SPIRIT.

Bring me to examine my own enthusiasm for You. Am I joyful and content being in fellowship with CHRIST and enthusiastic about His agenda? Or is it satisfying enough to just choose and accomplish good works. Help me search my heart, LORD, do I really love You or do I simply love to appear righteous?

CONFESSION

JUST MUNDANE CIRCUMSTANCES

Screen Shot 2015-09-11 at 1.03.49 PM…FATHER, a blade of grass fulfills its created purpose—it is a praise to Your glory. You intend Your “grace and power and other perfections should…become conspicuous and illustrious” Matthew Henry (ref#18, [Eph 1:3-14]). And Your intention is that I magnify You (ref#18, [Eph 1:3-14]).

Praise is ascribed to You for the salvation You have granted to me (ref#16, [Eph 1:12]). When I let You work through me, You get the praise. All I have to do is follow You where You place me. FATHER, prevent me from placing myself  Oswald Chambers (ref#83, p51).

I am tempted to ask You to help me be like CHRIST thinking others will see the goodness of You in me and praise You. But this is just a prideful request from my self-exalting nature. Another prideful request is for You to help me become more passionate for souls, but concentrating on saving souls is just religious commercialism (ref#83, p51).

Again, all I have to do is to follow You where You place me. When I am following You it will be a matter of indifference whether You put me in the spotlight or back stage. As long as I’m following You I can be unfairly accused or even be proven a failure without any irritation on my part (ref#83, p51).

CHRIST was a praise to Your glory. But, He was not obedient to His needs or the needs of men but obedient to Your will. Because of it, He was a ‘stone of stumbling’ to many people and I will be a ‘stone of stumbling’ by following Him (ref#83, p50-51).

Move me to realize that You have to be followed, I cannot clutch visions of grandeur that I become a beautiful specimen in Your showcase. I will reflect honor to You when I follow You in the mundane circumstances of life. (ref#83, p53).

How difficult is following? FATHER, help me keep it simple. When I begin to question which way to go, sin has complicated my walk. Sin urges me to involve myself in activities that go beyond Your wishes and my abilities. The sin in me desires to do great spiritual things—things that will wear me out and make me frustrated and sad. Urge me to keep it simple and just walk behind You for the praise of Your glory.

CONFESSION

Trying to Sin Less

Screen Shot 2015-09-04 at 1.45.04 PMMY FATHER, “When thou art angry towards me for my wrongs I try to pacify thee by abstaining from future sin; But teach me…that only Christ’s righteousness, ready made, already finished, is fit for that purpose; that thy chastising me for my sin is not that I should try to reform, but only that I may be more humbled, afflicted, and separated from sin, by being reconciled, and made righteous in Christ by faith;…” The Valley of Vision (ref#76, p96).

FATHER, my logic says, “Eliminate sin and I won’t need forgiveness—be good and I won’t have to suffer Your discipline.” But my striving to do better next time does not neutralize my sin.

“Sin is…deliberate and emphatic independence of God” Oswald Chambers (ref#7, Oct. 7th). All attempts I use to stop sinning and live right are attempts to usurp Your authority and put myself under my control.

“…the wicked…flatters and deceives himself…that his iniquity will not…be hated” (Ps 36:1-2 AMP).

“Sin is a fundamental relationship; it is not wrong doing, it is wrong being…” Oswald Chambers (ref#7, Oct 7th). In me is the heredity of sin. JESUS did not take my sins on Himself; he took on Himself my heredity of sin (ref#7, Oct 7th). I am not a sinner because I sin, but I sin because I am a sinner (ref#56, p781).

FATHER, I humbly accept Your Son’s finished work on the cross to cover my sinful nature. Keep reminding me that constantly I need CHRIST to take care of my sin. I don’t need Him just when I think have I sinned. King David said, “My sin is ever before me” (Ps 51:3). Keep alive in me, LORD, the sense of sin’s evil constantly so I might think upon CHRIST constantly (ref#35, p317).