CONFESSION

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A TRUE PICTURE OF MYSELF

screen-shot-2016-10-14-at-1-12-27-pm“O MY LORD, Forgive me for serving thee in sinful ways – by glorying in my own strength, by forcing myself to minister through necessity, by accepting the applause of others, by trusting in assumed grace and spiritual affection, by a faith that rests upon my hold on Christ, not on him alone, by having another foundation to stand upon beside thee; for thus I make flesh my arm” The Valley of Vision (ref#76, p182).

FATHER, there is no soundness in my flesh (Ps 38:3,7)—that part of me that is under the control of ordinary impulses. I have no health or rest when I pamper my flawed, damaged, evil nature. Loathsome and corrupt wounds sprout because of my foolishness in looking for comfort within my HOLY SPIRIT-less nature (Ps 38:5). I become feeble and crushed, faint and quite worn out from such effort; I groan be reason of the disquiet and moaning of my heart (Ps 38:8).

When I allow my depraved nature to rule me, my iniquities go over my head—like waves of a flood—they become a heavy burden weighing too much for me (Ps 38:4). My heart throbs, my strength fails me and the sparkle in my eyes disappear (Ps 38:10). My pain and sorrow are ever before me (Ps 38:17).

When I sin by making my own carnal-minded, prudent-seeming, decisions I ignite Your indignation, triggering Your discipline (Ps 38:3). Your arrows stick into me, and Your hand comes down on me (Ps 38:2).

FATHER, when, with rebukes, You correct and chasten me for sin, the beauty, vigor, and strength of my “first Adam” nature is marred and destroyed. Anything that is the object of my desire or delight (“strength, beauty, possessions, life itself”) disappears with Your expression of displeasure (ref#16, [Ps 39:11]). Your discipline causes me to see my natural nature as it is—not beautiful or strong.

Drive me to my knees; showcase my wretchedness; make me see how prudent it is to repent and stop relying on my old nature.

“Only in the Lord shall one say, I have righteousness (salvation and victory) and strength [to achieve].…” (Isa 45:24 AMP).

ADORATION

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CHRIST’S HUMILITY

screen-shot-2016-10-14-at-1-07-02-pmAmong us, CHRIST, You were gentle and humble in heart (Matt 11:29)—as the One who serves (Luke 22:27). You made Yourself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men (Phil 2:7). And being found in human form, You humbled Yourself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross (Phil 2:8). For my sake You became poor, that through Your poverty I might become rich (2 Cor 8:9).

In the days of Your flesh, You offered up prayers and supplications, with vehement cries and tears to Your FATHER. Only He was able to save You from death (Heb 5:7).

You gave Your back to those who struck You, and Your cheeks to those who plucked out the beard; You did not hide Your face from shame and spitting (Isa 50:6). You were a reproach to men and despised by the people (Ps 22:6). Zeal for Your FATHER’s house consumed You; all who reproached Your FATHER, fell on You (Ps 69:9).

FATHER, keep reminding me that my life’s goal is to be Your bondservant as CHRIST was. If You allow me to serve You in a specific way, keep me from focusing on that service. Rivet my focus on being Your bondservant. Refine me into salt (Matt 5:13)—too much salt to the unregenerate but a perfect portion for the regenerate so that my life mirrors CHRIST.

VALLEYS TO MOUNTAINTOPS

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HOLY SPIRIT – unholy spirit

5/27/2015

screen-shot-2016-10-14-at-12-58-31-pmIdentified the problem that was making me feel miserable. But it wasn’t the current problem.

Each day I was moving further away from the SPIRIT who I beheld so clearly over the weekend. He was fading like the morning dew. And there was no way I could find to go back treading the wet grass with Him. The ground was dry.

I definitely feel like I’ve lost a best friend. I mourn—longing for the exhilaration of “knowing” I was beside GOD Himself and able to obey Him exuberantly. The joy of it was addicting. Who obeys exuberantly when we’re in the room with just ourselves?

My journal is full of mountaintops and valleys where GOD is close, and then gone. My life marches to those ebb and flows. So, the logical question is, “How can I get myself again close to the SPIRIT?”

But, as soon as I ask that, I must be cautious reminding myself that the SPIRIT is like the wind (Acts 2:2)—hard to capture. And, I’ve read enough about revival to know mankind gets in trouble seeking to keep the SPIRIT after He’s made Himself known in an extraordinary way.

So the answer does not have anything to do with what I can do to get him to stay or to return. And, does it do any good to make a conscious effort to wait for Him—just sit and wait until I feel Him once again? Well, I have done that and sometimes it has worked.

Indeed, I’m instructed to ask for Him (Luke 11:13), but “waiting”—sitting and waiting is risky. It’s the same as in the great revivals where people loved His appearing so much they forgot all about who’s Spirit He was and only concentrated on Him. But, the SPIRIT does not initiate anything. He is obedient to the FATHER and the SON. So, I cannot wait expecting something from the SPIRIT directly.

The enemy is the great imitator. He is quite able to act in all the ways man has enjoyed the HOLY SPIRIT. But, he is the unholy spirit acting without the FATHER’s or CHRIST’s authority.

So now the question becomes: “How can I distinguish the real SPIRIT and guard against following the devil?” The words, “Holy, Holy, Holy” begin to give me the answer.

The Godhead, three in One, is “holy, holy, holy.” And I am not; so because I’m sinful I will be unable to feel myself in the SPIRIT’s presence continually. My journal entries do not lie—ebb and flow is how life is.

I flail around in the valley and continue to do so until I act in faith. I get that opportunity to act when the LORD puts spiritual information in front of my face. By faith only am I transported to the mountaintop.

A true mountaintop is always achieved by operating in faith; it is never achieved by waiting to “feel” the SPIRIT move. True, I may be aware of the SPIRIT when I am on the mountaintop but faith provided the foundation for Him. Faith always forms the foundation for the SPIRIT. Faith is a spiritual act; it is never accomplished by my human fleshly nature. The below quote helps me distinguish between the HOLY SPIRIT and the unholy spirit:

“Carnal pleasure, worldly profit and honor, the things of sense and time, are the things of the flesh…The favor of God, the welfare of the soul, the concerns of eternity, are the things of the Spirit” Matthew Henry’s Commentary of the Whole Bible (ref#18, [Rom 8:5]).

SABBATH

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THE SABBATH OF REST – SINCE TIME BEGAN: UNTIL TIME ENDS

“…the Sabbath entered Eden by man’s side. In its origin, it stands the firstborn of all ordinances. It is a portion of primary law. Its date precedes the date of sin. Away with the vain thought, that it is a short-lived flower of ritual field”  Henry Law (ref#214).

It arose not as a ceremony among ceremonies. Sinai was not its birth-place. The wilderness was not its cradle. Therefore Calvary is not its tomb. “It is no passing rite. It is the transcript of Jehovah’s mind. It shines a jewel in the high crown of moral law” Henry Law (ref#214).

It is God’s first command. The Patriarchs kept it. Sinai preached it. The holy tables gave it central place. The holy Ark encased it. The Jewish church revered it. Prophets enforced it. Jesus upheld it. The Apostles sanctioned it. The Christian church throughout all time has prized it. The prophetic finger still points to it as a last-day blessing. Is. 66:23. Eternity waits to be an eternity of Sabbath” Henry Law (ref#214).

“Jesus comes Himself. The mighty God instructs in human form….’The Sabbath was made for man.’ Mark 2:27. This is a mighty word. It looks backward, and forward. It seems to say, It always has been, for man always had need. It always shall be, for man will always need. Thus Jesus decks the Sabbath with undying freshness….It must march on, until time is lost in one Sabbatic rest” Henry Law (ref#214).

SUPPLICATION

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NON CHRISTIAN Resisters

[We all have friends and family that do not want anything to do with Christianity so it is up to us to pray for their salvation. Here’s an opportunity to pray for them. Fill their name in the blanks.]

WORKINGS OF THE SPIRIT

Screen Shot 2016-08-24 at 3.49.48 PM…FATHER, I thank You that I cannot find out who commits the “unpardonable sin” for it would surely devastate me. I know You glorify Yourself through dispensing wrath since You are holy and only bless ones who are holy through their embracing the cross of Your Son, but I sure don’t want ____ to suffer forever without You.

FATHER, I pray ____ come to understand Your SPIRIT’s work:

“It is the Holy Spirit’s work to enlighten the mind of sinners (Eph 1:17,18), to reveal and teach the gospel (John 14:26), persuading souls to repent and believe the truth (cf. Acts 7:51)” The Reformation Study Bible (ref#56, p1421, “The Unpardonable Sin”).

Your SPIRIT not only explains Your Word, but will open ____’s mind so (he/she) can perceive it (2 Cor 3:16,17).

I pray ____ has not deliberately and knowingly refused what the SPIRIT freely gives. I pray (he/she) has not committed such a “voluntary and informed act of malice” to the point that (his/her) heart is so hardened making (him/her) unable to repent (Heb 3:12-13) (ref#56, p 1421, “The Unpardonable Sin”).

I know there is a profound act of hatred that You have determined You will not forgive—indeed, cannot forgive. And, I know You must respond to offenses against Your love, but I pray that You continue to beckon ____. I pray (he/she) has not gone beyond (his/her) ability to turn back toward You. Send Your SPIRIT, FATHER to persuade ____ to repent and believe the truth!

THANKSGIVING

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YOU ARE SATISFIED WITH ME; I AM ASTONISHED

Screen Shot 2016-08-24 at 3.44.16 PM…FATHER, love is “an affection of union and nearness…” John Owen (ref#35, p113). The result of our union raises my level of love to You—it increases my faith. Because of our union I observe Your kindness, tenderness, unchangeableness, etc, which brings rest to my soul, and rest is my most prized possession (ref#35, p114).

O LORD, I desire to search out continually Your beauty for I am always seeking rest for my soul. This rest is a quiet joy that fills me completely so I find no need to roam unsatisfied. To be a doorkeeper in Your house, to get as close as I can to You is my desire, for a day in Your courts is better than a thousand elsewhere (Ps 84:10) (ref#35, p113).

“The union…of likeness, is the cause of the love of another” John Owen (ref#35, p113).

You rejoice over me with joy and rest in silent satisfaction. You are held still by the very depth of Your love for me—resting with contentment. You are delighted when You think of me—with deep and tender yearning love You hold me to Yourself. Your love for me so engulfs You, You leap for joy; every inward and outward expression or token of love is heaped together to express Yourself. You sing—Your contentment is expressed in singing—I cause the jubilee in Your heart (Zeph 3:17).

Thus, Your love animates me; it makes me fully satisfied with You so I will not seek further for another to love. Your love is a joy past belief, past utterance, past thought. I am motionless as I experience Your love but then must exult in an outward demonstration of my delight. Singing and praise is the result of my great enjoyment and pleasure in You. Your love is so surprising I must leap for joy or cry or do something that would embarrass even Michal, King David’s wife (2 Sam 6:16). Michal would think, “This is not normal.”  It may not be normal but how thankful I am it is real.

CONFESSION

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THE BLOOD

Screen Shot 2016-08-24 at 3.38.29 PMThe blood of the Lamb cleanses me from sin—not just the first time I come to Him. It is not a once-and-for-all cleansing but the blood of CHRIST continues to flow—continues to cleanse. It saves me all the days of my life.

It is satan’s ploy to draw me to CHRIST for initial repentance and then drive me out in the wilderness so that I use my natural resources to fight sin going forward. Surely the Galatians thought as I, “CHRIST has saved me, now I have to get my act together.” The Apostle Paul accuses them: “Are you so foolish? Having begun by the Spirit, are you now being perfected by the flesh” (Gal 3:3 ESV)?

“You may struggle against evil as long as you please, but…you will never be delivered from it in any way but by the blood of Jesus.…Your prayers, your repentance, and your tears—the whole of them put together—are worth nothing apart from Him” Charles Spurgeon (ref#34, April 23rd AM).

“In all failures in duty…remembering the innumerable tracers of imperfection and sin found upon all you do, deal frequently, closely, with the atoning blood. ‘Wash and be clean’ (2 Kings 5:13)”  Octavius Winslow (ref#61, July 18th). FATHER, remind me to always come.

“If you have ever come to the blood…you will feel your need of coming to it every day. He who does not desire to wash in it every day has never washed in it at all….there is still a fountain opened….Christ alone can give us joy and comfort….let us sprinkle our doorposts fresh with blood, and then, feast on the Lamb, assured that the destroying angel must pass us by” Charles Spurgeon (ref#34, April 17th AM).

ADORATION

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CHRIST’S BLOOD IS PRECIOUS

“…many achievements and…many blessings…Scripture ascribes to the power of the Blood of the Lord Jesus” Roy Hession (ref#97, p91-92)!

Screen Shot 2016-08-24 at 3.31.10 PMFATHER, CHRIST’s blood is “precious in its preserving power….the blood…is the true reason for our being spared” Charles Spurgeon (ref#34, April 16th AM). “By its power there is forgiveness of sins and eternal life for all who put their faith in the Lord Jesus ( John 6:54)” Roy Hession (ref#97, p92).

FATHER, “Christ’s blood is also precious in its cleansing power” Charles Spurgeon (ref#34, April 16th AM). By the power of the blood there is a continual cleansing from all my sin, past, present, and future (ref#97, p92). Your Son’s blood not only cleanses me from all sin (1 John 1:7), but purifies my conscience so I may serve You (Heb 9:14).

“The blood of Christ is precious in its sanctifying influence. The same blood that justifies by taking away sin, in its after-action, quickens the new nature and leads it onward to subdue sin and to carry out the commands of God”  Charles Spurgeon (ref#34, April 16th AM).

VALLEYS TO MOUNTAINTOPS

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GRACEBEARERS_3

Screen Shot 2016-08-24 at 3.28.04 PMNOTE: This journal entry contains portions taken from the book, The Journal of Ann Schultz, (ref#217). (Ann’s assignment at GraceBearers was to read Scripture and give the ending prayer.)

2/19/08, Tuesday

GraceBearers is over. After all my preparation—thinking this way and that—it, of course, played out nothing like any scenario I came up with while planning for it.

I walked into the room with my own list of how I’ve grieved the SPIRIT. And fell into the challenge of stifling sobs when Alice mentioned a few more that I hadn’t thought of.

For my part (Scripture reading and prayer after Alice’s talk), I simply indicated to the women that they refer to the “Scripture and Prayer” print-out at their convenience, and suggested we take the time to contemplate how we grieve the SPIRIT and privately confess.

Alice ended the meeting by allowing women to come to the microphone and confess their personal grieving the SPIRIT. So many did, that our dismissal was quite late. I sat in my chair frozen with grief long after dismissal. I couldn’t have chit-chatted with anyone if I wanted to.

Seems every GraceBearer’s meeting I can’t get beyond grieving over my sin of offending such a holy GOD.

SABBATH

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THE SABBATH COMMANDMENT COMMANDS US TO WORK

…NOTE: I hesitate to quote a single author extensively in this blog post but R. C. Sproul, Jr. writes such wise remarks I can’t resist. Consider reading every word carefully and if you want to read his entire article, see: http://www.ligonier.org/learn/articles/rest-story/

“First, believe it or not, the Sabbath commandment commands us to work. “Six days shalt thou labor” isn’t an interesting prelude designed merely to set the context for the command to come. It is a command in itself. We’re supposed to be busy with the work set before us. We are to be passionately pursuing the kingdom of God. We are to recognize that we live in the not-yet of the kingdom. Not all enemies have yet been made a footstool. We have not yet fully exercised dominion over the creation. The reign of Jesus is not yet universally recognized. The Westminster Shorter Catechism asks, “How does Christ execute the office of a king?” Its answer: “Christ executes the office of a king in subduing us to Himself, in ruling and defending us and in restraining and conquering all His and our enemies.” As we rule with and under Him, this is the work we are called to — seeking His kingdom, making manifest His reign.

“Second, as the Sabbath commandment moves to the day of observance, it does not command that we refrain from work — it’s far more profound: we are to rest. We think we are keeping the commandment if we refuse gallantly to do any of the work that is piling up and causing us to lose sleep at night. Instead, we are sinning. Rest isn’t just ceasing from working; it is also ceasing from worrying. It’s not easy. Indeed, in a manner of speaking, rest, especially ceasing from worry, is hard work. It takes discipline and fortitude to let go of all that has us worried.

“We have not succeeded if our worries are more pious, either. That is, we aren’t failing to keep the Sabbath when we worry about the big meeting at work on Monday, but successfully keeping it when we are worried about our persistent failure to mortify that particular sin that so troubles us. Worry is worry, and it has no place in our Sabbath celebration. The Lord’s Day is a feast day and should be treated as such” (ref#213).