WAITING AND WORSHIP
In order to go I need to stop. On Your path, FATHER, there is no such thing as moving ahead on auto pilot.
“Prayer is the solace of the soul…we can not be said to wait upon God without prayer; for prayer is the fixing of the eye, the outgoing of the heart, the breathing of the spirit, the cry of the soul” James Smith (ref#303).
The hard part about being obedient to You is waiting for Your instructions. Not only do You require I give You a piece of my precious 24 hours, but I must clean out all thoughts in my head that are self-centered.
I must resign to give up all I’m doing or want to do selfishly. HOLY FATHER, You will only talk to a holy vessel. CHRIST and the SPIRIT make possible my holiness. I thank them for their help.
Waiting empty and clean propels me into worship. Reflecting on what You have done for me—reflecting on Who You are…
“…the natural reason to praise God is for what he has done for me. This is okay, but doesn’t go far enough….God deserves praise simply because he is God. The…focal point for our thoughts is not our deep longings but…is…the immeasurably great ‘God of glory’ (Acts 7:2)” Edward T. Welch (ref#106, p154).
So, FATHER, aid me that I might wait for You, draw me into worship instead of work. Worshipping births no specific instructions for the day, but produces a new character in me that is ready to follow You in obedience each moment. How I love to be in Your presence. What work? I just want to be where You are.
“Pride slays thanksgiving…A proud man is seldom a grateful man, for he never thinks he gets as much as he deserves” Henry Ward Beecher (ref#130, p177). “Pride is self-absorption whether we’re absorbed with how miserable we are or how wonderful we are” Beth Moore (ref#105, p58).
“As long as we have a conceited, self-righteous idea that we can do the thing if God will help us, God has to allow us to go on until we break the neck of our ignorance over some obstacle…The bedrock of Jesus Christ’s kingdom is poverty, not possession; not decisions for Jesus Christ, but a sense of absolute futility” Oswald Chambers (ref#118, p14).
FATHER, it is true that “low self-esteem usually means that I think too highly of myself….The reason I feel bad about myself is that I aspire to something more” Edward T. Welch (ref#106, p32). But, why do I want others, even JESUS to think I am great (ref#106, p19)?
“The first biblical perspective on the fear of man is that it is the result of the nakedness that comes from sin. Because of sin still present within us, we experience embarrassment, shame, the feeling of being exposed and vulnerable. As a result, we try to protect ourselves and avoid the gaze of others….even though it feels as if other people are doing the exposing, in reality we carry the shame with us all the time. Other people simply trigger its appearance” Edward T. Welch (ref#106, p35).
“’Christ could afford to be humble as He served upon this earth. After all, He was the Son of God. He had nothing to prove. Yet does His Word not also say that we are heirs of God and joint heirs with Christ?’” Beth Moore (ref#105, p66).
I have nothing to prove. No one can be in a better position than a child of GOD. Yes, I confess to attempting to be a spiritual giant instead of taking on humility. FATHER, humble and test me so You can do me good (Deut 8:16).
“…whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin” (James 4:17 ESV).
Anger is my announcement to myself that I am seeking my own way and not Yours, FATHER. And the announcement makes me madder—it tells me I’m failing at being righteous—the very thing I want to be known for.
You have taught me so much. I know so much of the right things to do. I’m irritated that I know so much which proclaims to me how often I fail. Ah, but anger clues me that I have fallen into the devil’s ploy of trying to be spiritually ambitions (ref#105, p68).
“The massive interest in self-esteem and self-worth exists because it is trying to help us with a real problem. The problem is that we really are not okay. There is no reason why we should feel great about ourselves. We truly are deficient” Edward T. Welsh (ref#106, p29).
“When a man really sees himself as the Lord sees him, it is not the abominable sins of the flesh that shock him, but the awful nature of the pride of his own heart against Jesus Christ” Oswald Chambers (ref#7, March 8th).
Pride makes me angry. But how can I let my selfishness upstage CHRIST? CHRIST a continual servant—excepting life as it came—never getting His way—never.
“All He did was for others. When He came from heaven, it was for others. When He laid down His life, it was for others….when He was raised again…it was…to justify others…the position He occupies…now in heaven is for others,…” Roy and Revel Hession (ref#100, p139).
“For every one look at myself I must take ten looks at Jesus” Edward T. Welsh (ref#106, p67). Anger begs a “time-out.” And a productive “time-out” is to squelch anger by looking to JESUS.