CRYING AND SQUAWKING
I sit in the closet wanting the SPIRIT—to be led by Him, but don’t feel I have time to wait for Him. I have my day planned and I need to get to it, yet, I will wait for a bit even if it takes forfeiting breakfast and doing laundry.
I hope to sing praise to my LORD, but I do not want my flesh to have any part of it. SPIRIT, turn my heart to sing.
As I wait here my flesh suggests ways the SPIRIT may come. Thoughts flesh put through my mind are the way I “put GOD in a box.” Also the SPIRIT will not come while flesh is thinking thoughts like, “Come quickly SPIRIT, so I’ll have time for breakfast.” I have doubts; “Maybe this desire to wait is from satan trying to keep me from my day’s plans.”
I reject the thoughts and continue my vigil. How flesh wants to entertain itself; it tries everything to divert my attention. Can the SPIRIT work within me the same time flesh is bombarding my mind with such ramblings? No, I can’t experience both. The SPIRIT does not dwell with flesh. He conquers flesh. When He comes flesh shrivels like a piece of paper in a fire and is no more heard from.
Suddenly my heart comes alive as I sit doing nothing for it perceives it has time to go around Your altar, O LORD, and proclaim thanksgiving aloud and tell of all Your wonderful deeds (Ps 26:7).
When I give my heart opportunity to express itself the SPIRIT gives it utterance! So, it has worked—this waiting. The Ps 26:7 Scripture was the bridge the SPIRIT and my heart walked over in order to express themselves in my actions. The desire of my heart was to sing praise to GOD. And, my heart sang!
(I surprised myself for all my voice could do was squeak. It was a confirmation that flesh had no part in this.) Flesh was burning like paper in the fire.
My thoughts overwhelmed me when I came to thinking about the FATHER giving me CHRIST. What I heard in the world was a guitar playing and me squawking and crying. Then I had the sense that CHRIST was near. I judged my feelings as like Isaiah in his Isaiah chapter six writings.
I have to laugh. When I first thought of praising GOD in song, I decided on a certain portion of Scripture to sing. That was my flesh deciding. When the SPIRIT took over I forgot completely about that portion of Scripture.
That portion of Scripture is beautiful—an excellent piece to offer in praise, but it would have offended GOD if I had sung it to Him. Lingering in the closet this morning has given me one situation where I KNOW I have walked step by step with GOD’s SPIRIT and not let my enemy direct me. Thank You, FATHER, for answering my prayer as I waited.